Indie people have recently come to my attention as the “new hippie,” though you could never get away with calling them that to their face. Well, along with the rest of Indie culture, we now have a savior for these mountain men, one who “doesn’t take no crap from the man.” While Indie Jesus may have kept his sacrosanct sandals and beard, he has been given a +1 Sweater Vest of Truth to replace his simple, white robes, and the addition of a vintage belt assures Him that He’ll be accepted at the next Pitchfork staff meeting.
I wonder if He stays up nights listening to Bon Iver? Now all we need is Hipster Paul of Tarsus.
Have you ever wanted to make a difference to those in the world who are less fortunate than you but just couldn’t drag yourself away from the computer? Well now you can spread some good karma, as well as food, to those who need it.
Free Rice is a non-profit website that is a part of the UN World Food Programme. The site quizzes you in subjects ranging from Art to Chemistry to English to four separate foreign languages (French, German, Italian, and Spanish). The long and short of it is that for every question you answer correctly, FreeRice will donate ten grains of rice to the UN World Food Programme in order to feed the hungry across the world. Basically, you can brush up on the subjects you didn’t pay attention to back in school and help those in need at the same time!
Check it out!
My friends, the end has come. The beast has risen, and its name is Conservapedia.
Now, for those of you who may be faithful adherents to this website, I do not profess to have seen all the content of their wiki, but I have seen with my own two eyes their “Conservative Bible Translation,” which mocks the Greek the New Testament was written in. Let me go through a few points with you:
1. The first two words of their main page are “Liberal Bias.” I think all of us can see where this is heading.
2. They outline three main “sources of error” in translations of the Bible:
• lack of precision in the original language, such as terms underdeveloped to convey new concepts introduced by Christ
• lack of precision in modern language
• translation bias in converting the original language to the modern one.
This part is especially laughable. Basically, these folks are claiming that since both languages are precise, neither can be relied on for a definitive meaning, and thus only Conservatives can bring out the “true Conservative meaning” behind the text. To solve this problem, these “translators” are working from the most definite language they can find: King James English. The accusation of a translation bias is also ridiculous, since this calls into question the merits and skill of the International Bible Society and the Wycliff Bible Translators, two of the most respected translation societies.
3. They offer ten guidelines for their work. Here are a few of the best:
• Framework against Liberal Bias: providing a strong framework that enables a thought-for-thought translation without corruption by liberal bias.
They give no specific examples of this “liberal bias” here, but one can assume they are referring to the multiple hippies referenced in Scripture.
• Not Emasculated: avoiding unisex, “gender inclusive” language, and other feminist distortions; preserve many references to the unborn child (the NIV deletes these).
Apparently, the idea of including humans other than men in the term αδελφος is a blasphemy unto God that has been inserted by feminists wishing to subvert the chauvinistic Christ.
• Utilize Powerful Conservative Terms: using powerful new conservative terms to capture better the original intent; Defective translations use the word “comrade” three times as often as “volunteer”; similarly, updating words that have a change in meaning, such as “word”, “peace”, and “miracle”.
Still out to stop the Red Scare, I see. I wonder how the word “miracle” needs to be updated, and how “peace” might have been misinterpreted for 2,000 years.
This last one is my personal favorite:
• Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning.
Jesus apparently was content to let the market fix itself. Why else would he have come to earth, if not simply to give us a pattern for how our governments should structure their economies? I guess they missed the parable of the talents and Jesus’s “redistribution of wealth.” That part must have been a redaction by the liberals of the 1st century.
As a translator and scholar of these texts in their original form, this makes me laugh, but also makes me question the motives of those who profess to be “Christian.” Politicizing Christ in this way is akin to placing an eagle on the cross in the place of Jesus. The creators of this “translation” have made the error of the Jewish zealots; they understood Jesus as coming to revolutionize their government and free them from political oppression. In reality, the message of Christ is about freedom from spiritual oppression, and any political undertones that can be found in Scripture are all subordinate to His spiritual message and salvific work.
Check out their translation of the Epistle to Philemon for a good laugh.
Wonders abound in the worlds of religion and irreligion, but one of the most fascinating came to my attention today: a site dedicated to saving your pet in the event you get “raptured”. After taking a cursory glance, I figured this was purely a joke site that was made in 5 minutes by some atheists looking for a laugh, but it turns out that these guys actually get money for their work.
The contract is harmless enough. Here are a few snippets:
“In the event of the death of the subscribing pet owner prior to the Rapture the contract will remain in effect. EE-BP will continue to honor the contract for the remainder of the contract period. We do not adopt / rescue animals except as a result of the Rapture occurance.”
“Should a relative residing within the rescue location not be Raptured and opts to retain the pet(s), EE-BP will not take possession of the pet(s). No refund will be tendered.”
“If subscriber loses his/her faith and/or the Rapture occurs and subscriber is not Raptured (aka is “left behind”) EE-BP disclaims any liability; no refund will be tendered.”
Quotes taken from Eternal Earth-Bound Pets, USA – Contract and Payment
They do actually have subscribers, and members of their organization, confirmed atheists who have no worry of being taken should a rapture occur, will honestly uphold their end of the bargain. Also, a portion of the revenue made from their Google advertising is donated to food banks in their area. These guys are legit, and some people are worried enough about the rapture that they legitimately fear this. Seems like these guys are helping a lot of people, while helping us laugh at ourselves a bit, too. Check them out.